Tuesday, 15 May 2007

Soap Blues

Can you tolerate them? No, I can't. Never. No. They cause headaches, they cause me to hate my dinner (most of them come in the 8-10 slot), and cause almost daily fights between me and my mother. The Ekta Kapoor factory is spewing out loads of poison and millions of people (mostly housewives) are gulping it down as if it is 'amrit'.

Well don't think I just dislike them for the sake of disliking, 'cos I have got some extremely valid arguments. Now, tell me honestly, is there even an inkling of logic in the stories of soaps be it Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki or Kyunki Sas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi?? So now allow me to raise some of the points that irritate me highly :

1. These serials claim to project the common Indian household. Utter rubbish!! Each of these soap families are easily multi-millionaires. They talk of Rs. 50 lakh with as as much ease as the common man talks of Rs 500. And think of the average Indian household being millionaires.

2. In the highly irritating soap opera Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki, main protagonist Parvati started off as a 32 something women (considering the fact that she had a daughter aged 10-12 years). After that the soap has undergone two 'leaps' of 20 years each. So that makes her age in the serial about 72 years!!!!! But does she look like a day over 30????!!!

3. Doubles or humshakals are as easy to find as trees in Sunderbans.

4. Whenever a man/women is shown driving a car an accident is imminent.

5. Even the dropping of a feather causes complete memory loss, but which comes magically back after the application of a well-timed slap.

6. The background score is enough to scare away even seasoned metal musicians.

7. Song and dance sequences that look worse than C grade movies.

And you can go on writing like this, it will never stop. And nor will the soaps. They will just go on....crazy kiya re (in the most derogatory manner possible) !!

PS: (on a more fantastic note) I am just waiting for the day when some true lover of the TV will shoot Ekta Kapoor down.


Neelakantan said...

Not to mention the endless time line. Don't these characters ever die? Hell in English soaps(a shade better than our desi ones) the characters die, new characters are introduced, its somewhat believable.

And dear god... the endless discussions devoted to the pieces of garbage is enough to make you sick.

PS:- This is probably the reason why almost all comedy shows spoof soaps. ;-)

The Radicals said...

soaps, hehehe, sahi likhaa hai, you cannot stop yourself from picking out insanity in them

bloody time waste they are! ye log inko baith kar jhelte bhi kaise hain? :O

main to bachaa hoon, i dont watch tv :P

anwesha said...

hvn so many drawbacks still hw cum dese serials make to rule d television.....
let me illustrate;
1.housewives,who after a day's toil find pleasure n entertainment.
2.most indian women who prefer 2 stay indoors n r shy 2 open up relate dmselves wid d characters.
3.hvy makeup,jewellery,designer sarees draw their attention.
4.pre marital n extra marital affairs widely appeal 2 d indian housewives.
5.no mtr hw mch modern v r ,indian housewives stl dwell in dr imaginations in dr traditional world.joint family,puja,hawan,festivals,''adarsh pati vrata nari''.......dese r d things dy aspire n fantasise though it dsnt ve ne connection wid reality. so d female characters bcum a replica of their imagination..
6.ofcrse women loooooov gossips.

though i hate serials,still i tried 2 prove y dy r famous.

Animesh Ray said...

That was a nice summing up by Anwesha. I really have to agree with you.

Though,"pre marital n extra marital affairs widely appeal 2 d indian housewives."...is it really...

anwesha said...

well pre marital n extra marital affairs.....this is a relevant n current phase vch many indian households r goin thru.......
indian women wid dr lackadaisical attitude 2wards lyf ,mostly fail 2 cope up wid ds situations.....dy r quite indolent 2...whn d on screen characters face sch a situation dy meet dr odr half......n fite d way 2 victory....

a bit ''abv d ordinary'' observation....but a anodr odd way 2 luk at it......;d

Animesh Ray said...

well...maybe what u r saying is completely correct. Girls know best!!

anwesha said...

not dat gals kno best....b a pessimist!!!!!

Anonymous said...

So qrazy..


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